She's Got A Ticket To Ride - beatles

Juli: im invisible for other reasons but im hear if you want to tell me all about your wonderful trip

me: I DO!

i'm watching 30 Rock with a corona and the worst homemade nachos i've ever eaten meditating on a blog entry about it

Juli: k im back (i had to load chrome. I'm trying it out)

me: note: do not used baked beans

they're putrid with cheddar and salsa

just fyi

Juli: hah k

me: so i flew in thurs

and it was 18 degrees

J picked me up and we drove to her place

she pointed out parts of the city i settled in and we caught up till her fiance came home

then i took em out to dinner at this place which is basically burlesque meets bbq

she was thinking of meeting up with ppl at a party but we were all pooped

so we hit the sack around 10ish

friday morning i went to her 4 M1 classes

which were great

it was good to see that, definitely sitting up front, everyone in the back was chatting and passing notes and buying crap on their computer

i was like..uhh gradschool? wassup kids?

anyway

then i met up with my host NT who's an M2

oh wait

before that i went to a C___ meeting with J, she's going to Ghana this summer

then... GETTING MARRIED!

Juli: nice

me: so i transferred my stuff tot NT's car then hung out with him n some M2 kids

watched hockey in their lounge area

then we went back to his place and i dumped my stuff in my room! my own room!

then took a nap, woke up, and went to a fish fry!

with a bunch of M2's at a church. yes a church.

but we just stood in line talking and drinking beer

then woke up,... every 75 minutes but that's beside the point... and got ready for my interview day!!!

really hit it off with the M2s which was great

interview day was brkfst then a welcome speech then a lecture on financing education then we went upstairs for interviews

the faculty one was with a guy who mainly works with 3rd yrs

he doesnt typically interview but they called him in for this

and it was like my stars aligned b/c what he does is what J's classes were about so we had something to talk about casually

the lectures were on death/dying, breaking bad news, etc

and he works with M3's on how to deal with the hard stuff and move on

interesting guy

he thought it was great that i did art and had this whole other world

i was prepared to explain my art degree when he asked and he liked what i had to say

then we talked about service, iggies, etc

really hit it off and managed to keep my answers relatively short and to the point

the student interview which was basically immediately afterward

it was intense at first she just sat there and stared at first

then we started talking about stuff... i blabbered at first... but then it went well, really well,

they wanted to know about my service projects especially peace games

and my philosophy that service gave me

and what i wanted to contribute and when i explained it all they were really excited to have me

it was amazing
I still can't believe I got an interview!!

let alone just came back from it

AND

did it while i was really sick

and exhausted

and just broke up with my boyfriend

i did it

with flying colors

Exhausted. No ride from airport if weren't for K's bf. Slept on porch till someone came home. Last time I leave my keys at home.

So exhausted. Still sick but mostly over it. Must. Sleep.

More later.

Overall: !!!!!! :) :) :) All signs point to yes!!


:) :)

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Don't Have to Live Like a Refugee - tom petty

As we began our dissent into cow town, the cloud cover lifted dramatically to reveal a thick white blanket of snow. White. Everywhere. For miles. 18 degrees. The hallway out of the plane ended with a sign that read "Tornado Shelter" and for a brief moment I had a steady visual of the airport being torn in half. I love it already.

J and A's place is more like a small castle. J's grandfather's contribution to her education here was this magnificently cozy condo. Hardwood floors, living room, full kitchen, office, master. Granted this isn't your typical med student's living quarters, I saw myself here: trenching through the snow to class, bundled up, coffee in tow, head full of anatomy... I couldn't wait. I'll probably be living in a tiny one room den above a coffee shop somewhere with an air mattress on the floor and a hotplate... but bring it! I'm here. I'm ready. Let's do this.

It's 6:44am and J and A are still asleep. I kept waking up with weird dreams of riding my dead dog around some neighborhood I didn't recognize and to hack up my lungs. Yeah as much as I'm trying to convince myself I'm not, I'm a sick pup right now. Interview's tomorrow and I think I'm ready. I feel comfortable here. And I REALLY want to get in. This school is PERFECT for me.

Alright I hear movement, I must be off. J's taking me to her behavioral med class. Jealous? You should be ;)

Learning to Fly - tom petty

Well. It's done.

Packing is more or less finished. It's supposed to be 32 degrees on the best day... YIKES. Tomorrow night drops to 9 degrees. I fear my SoCal wardrobe wont cut it, I'm still fighting off whatever flucoldvirus has infiltrated my insides, and I just ousted a good person from my heart because our lives no longer fit together. O helped calm and center me over a feast of sushi, M took me in and let me unload. And K and L will be shipping off with me to our respective destinies this weekend. Nothing is stopping me, even if I hurl yellow swirls into the toilet, I'm getting that spot! This is my life and I'm taking the reigns!

Single and air born by 0900 PST.

Wish me luck!

Sending out an SOS - police

Clinic manager D called me into the clinic yesterday, subject line of the email was "SOS," and when I got there I found out she was under a lot of pressure, probably from budget cuts from donors and was being evaluated so she brought in "the best." After my 2.5 month hiatus I couldn't wait to get back in the trenches and to hear this just made my week.

Three patients yesterday prefaced their chief complaint with "this might gross you out" or "this is a little embarrassing." I responded to all the same way: try me.

Patient 1 had several stitches on his scalp piecing together a rather nasty blow to his head, sort of looked like an Astrix of skin but judging from the yellow and white discharge billowing out of his sutures it was pretty clear he had an rather severe infection. Though his stitches were done at an excellent local hospital, what about when he leaves? All you can do is give them the best that you have while they're under your care and just pray for them when they leave.

Patient 2 had another head injury where what used to be a staph infection had eaten away at a good part of the back of his neck, what remained was under another infection, the tissue soft and inflamed. After walking him to the exam room I started wondering if homeless shelters change their sheets on a regular basis... and who else might be out there with this problem that hasn't found our clinic yet.

Patient 3 was of a personal nature and not the first, nor the second, that I had come across. I kept a straight, serious, attentive face with un-flushed cheeks as he described his situation to me. I would post it here but I suspect others who read this in the future may not be as understanding or calm about such subjects and don't feel right describing their memory here unless under total trust.

I've learned over the past few months that not everyone is at my level of tolerance, and that meals should be kept separate from graphic descriptions of pus and blood. **but omg! I'm so lucky to be on my way to this career... so exciting! There's so much work to do! And no, I dont feel overwhelmed by it, in fact, I am completely inspired!

Oh it was so good to be back! The staff remembered me and hoped I'd stay. I told them about my interview and D said to name drop the clinic, that way over in cow country in all likelihood they'll have heard of it. This is my favorite place to be, how could I not brag about it :)

Mañana Is Good Enough For Me - peggy lee

Where's James Cameron when you need him? Can I just fall asleep and have my avatar take over until next Sunday?

Went to my second mock interview last night after reading everything i could get my lil paws on about Creighton... I even read their Strategic Plan for 2008-2018... and she asked one question, politely let me answer -- for ten minutes -- then turned off the recorder and said. Ok. So. What do you think?

"Long."

How do you sum up 24 years of life into a two minute inspirational monologue?
----
In other news, I can add love life to the list of things I have sacrificed in pursuit of this dream of mine...

This Could Be the Start of Something Big - frank sinatra

For three years I have been grinding my bones for what was, up to four days ago, the biggest dream I could dream: becoming a doctor. And four days ago, the universe granted me a genuine shot at making that dream reality. I landed my first (and currently only) medical school interview!! Oh Atlas, what a relief it was to lift the world off my shoulders...

As the rejections from jobs and grad schools began piling up in my chest I started feeling the watchful eyes of my parents burning into my back as I kept scaling one cliff after another, climbing as high as I could, to get to that highest peak where, perchance, I could get a glimpse of my destiny. To come home that day, and announce that someone somewhere had finally given me a chance was the biggest release of frustration, pressure, and anxiety unparalleled by all other feats thus far in my life. I cried. They were tears of joy, relief and exhaustion. I had been running on empty for such a long time but kept going, fueled on pure hope and determination... and finally... FINALLY... my stars aligned.

So here I am, prepping for my mock interview after work today with a career counselor, peering wide eyed into my future, the threshold of which is just a week away...

To Do:
prep for mock interview
figure out what to wear in 30 degree weather
piece together an interview ensemble on a zero dollar budget
plan transportation from my hotel to the university and back
get J's number for pick up at the airport
make a little thank you care package for J for hosting me
breathe focus breathe